Exciting Office Moment

I zipped through the rows of cubicles, a huge grin plastered to my face, mail cart barely kept in check in front of me. Skidding around a plump secretary and a plumper manager (from a different floor, scandalous), I built back up to another sprint, dodging the surprisingly nimble cart around many a worker.

‘Watch it!’ several of them grumbled in the exact same monotone, before slumping back into their well-designed commercial fitouts, Melbourne paper propped open to the same page, biting into identical tuna sandwiches.

I’d always hated tuna.

‘Excuse me!’ I called out enthusiastically, in place of a horn I could really lean on. ‘Important delivery, excuse me!’ Most people ignored me, but I hadn’t hit anybody yet, and I was almost at my destination! (Toes don’t count.)

Finally, I arrived at the executive office, where the head-head-head honchos all sat around with their Australian papers propped open at the exact same page, eating an entirely different class of seafood. I parked the mail cart, stepping up to the CEO’s door and rapping on it enthusiastically. 

‘What?’ came the disgruntled reply from inside. ‘Sharon, I told you, I’m at lunch!’

I looked around me nervously, spotting an empty secretary’s desk. It looked like Sharon was at lunch too.

‘Not Sharon!’ I called back, still with a big smile. ‘Something for you, Mr. Janus!’

A general rumbling came from the other side of the door as Mr. Janus climbed out of his sturdy office chair and hobbled towards the door. He swung it open, glaring down at me. Behind his considerable bulk, I could see what looked like the pinnacle in modern office interior design – Melbourne fashion moved quickly though, and I could already spot a few anachronistic details.

‘What?’ he growled, although not unkindly.

‘This,’ I said, still grinning, pulling a fat envelope out of the pile in the cart. ‘It’s for you – Mr. Janus, right?’

He didn’t reply, but glanced pointedly at the huge brass nameplate on his door. I nodded appreciatively.

‘You’ve been served,’ I informed him, and swiftly turned away.